Subject: My thoughts on SA
Ecthelio007
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Post at 23-9-2020 01:44  Profile P.M. 
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My thoughts on SA

SA has been getting a spike in attention as the usual source of spiritual refreshment have dried up due to this damn pandemic.
I've been pretty active on the platform for almost a week now and I believe I have a pretty solid assessment.

To start with, I'm Chinese, mid 30s, and well paid, but not financially independent yet. I posted a great picture of myself. Physically, I'd rate myself an 8/10 by Chinese standards for men my age.
In terms of conversation, I'm a salesman by trade. I keep it casual and non-committal, I don't think I'm doing anything wrong in this sector.
Your mileage may vary if you're a Euro/American expat at 190 cm. It may vary a lot I think. But for those who're more like me, this is what you should expect.

---

Frankly speaking, I think the assessment from some of the other reviewers here have been overly optimistic, especially with the situation we're in now with the pandemic.
Here's what it comes down to: unless money is absolutely no issue for you, as in paying 4 to 7K per punt (not counting hotel, dinner etc) with an amateur is OK with you, I don't think any of the girls you'll find in HK are worth it, not even close.

The problem is with the girls we have left in HK now:

- Mostly local girls, usually the typical 港女, the local bros here know what I mean.

- A few Euro/American expats, who're probably the best options if you're not a local-culture person yourself

- A few mainlanders, a few who are claiming to be Japanese.


I've gotten quite a few offers but none of them met my 3 criteria:

1. Girl has to be gorgeous. I'm not paying 5K for a 7/10.

2. Girl has to have a similar cultural background to me as an ABC. Without this, I don't see much real chemistry developing.

3. Girl needs to be OK with PPM, and not require a monthly fee just to start.


And the chatting, waiting for a reply, getting ghosted etc. etc., it's all too much like real dating, the kind you don't have to pay for.

---

HOWEVER, I think SA might be much better in other cities. I did some scouting on other major cities in Asia and Europe. It would seem that the selection in Shanghai, Shenzhen, Beijing, Berlin, Paris, London are all excellent. Moscow seems to be the epicenter. If you live there, congrats. They're all vastly better than Hong Kong both in terms of quality and quantity. HK is severely lacking, same with Singapore. Tokyo and Seoul don't look great either, the girls either show nothing or they're obviously plastic/fake.

---


My advice is to wait out the pandemic.

When we finally arrive on the other side of this nightmare, there will be a DELUGE of girls from all our favorite places. I think we all know why.
Prices will go down as supply overwhelms demand. We just have to be patient.

[ Last edited by  Ecthelio007 at 23-9-2020 01:49 ]

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shyrocket   31-1-2021 23:24  Acceptance  +3   Excellent suggestions! Thanks very much!
mcbond1800   24-9-2020 15:44  Acceptance  +3   Thanks for sharing your thoughts - mine are different but will respond later
JackTheBat   23-9-2020 19:10  Acceptance  +10   Thanks for this.
charliebrown   23-9-2020 15:57  Acceptance  +4   Good thoughts/suggestions.
jeffzeke   23-9-2020 09:53  Acceptance  +20   thanks for writing on this topic! I'll add my thoughts below.
alex_french   23-9-2020 09:09  Acceptance  +5   Good insight and see my comment below.
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mature1145
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For those who can offer a bit extra money, you can find decent girls from other countries flying to you, I tried mostly with Ukrainians, Russians and chinese from mainland.  Local girls in SA are rather limited even before the pandermic. I would prefer spending a little more to have the girl a few girls rather than paying 7k for one hour punt.

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shyrocket   31-1-2021 23:25  Acceptance  +3   I love this idea but alas, not possible for me
charliebrown   23-9-2020 13:57  Acceptance  +4   THIS!
jeffzeke   23-9-2020 09:54  Acceptance  +20   thanks for this opinion. Are these girls you have met before or are you flying them to HK for an initial meet?
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charliebrown
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Post at 23-9-2020 14:03  Profile P.M. 
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Reply #2 mature1145's post

Completely agree with you especially for those of us that have kept in communication with other girls from out of the country (especially in SE Asia). For 3000-4000HKD, you can fly a girl from Thailand here and have her stay with you for a few days/weeks. Pamper her, provide a place, food, etc. At the end of it, you might spend more than you would for an SA PPM, but there's no time limit!

Of course, if you're married, etc then you're out of luck lol.

All that to say, I've been thinking about this once traveling resumes since I've made a couple of solid contacts from my travels abroad. It might be fun!

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shyrocket   31-1-2021 23:26  Acceptance  +3   Love this “planning ahead” and I have similar aspirations
jeffzeke   24-9-2020 09:47  Acceptance  +20   sounds like a good plan!
Ecthelio007   23-9-2020 15:50  Acceptance  +3   How would that work though? They'd need to stay in quarantine for 2 weeks.
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charliebrown
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Post at 23-9-2020 15:54  Profile P.M. 
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Reply #3 charliebrown's post

@ecthelio007

Assuming when traveling resumes, there will be no need for quarantine. That or the travel bubble shenanigans.
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Ecthelio007
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Post at 23-9-2020 16:34  Profile P.M. 
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QUOTE:
Originally posted by charliebrown at 23-9-2020 15:54
@ecthelio007

Assuming when traveling resumes, there will be no need for quarantine. That or the travel bubble shenanigans.

When travel resumes, then SA will be redundant.
I expect we will get a flood of WG. It will be glorious.

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Flybydr   26-9-2020 13:15  Acceptance  +4   The gates will open and the angels will sing
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mature1145
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Post at 24-9-2020 05:44  Profile P.M. 
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@jeffzeke initial meet in HK, take your time to talk with the girls and arrange video chat so that you can assess the girl, eastern girls are usually pretty easy, but there are scams too, otherwise some of these eastern european works in China, and the flight would be shorter and cheaper.

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jeffzeke   24-9-2020 09:49  Acceptance  +20   All the girls who I travel with or pay to fly to me are ones I've met at least once before.
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mcbond1800
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Post at 25-9-2020 23:57  Profile P.M. 
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Reply #1 Ecthelio007's post

Just wanted to add my two cents to some of the comments above

Personally - i enjoy SA. But i do agree that SA is not for everyone. Your gotta be comfortable with the costs, its not about value. You can find amazing gems that are stunning, its a lot more work but the payoff is worth it. Typically most SD on sa are much older than 30, i would image they are 45-55. If you offer me the hottest thing on earth snd she is a zstarfish and a normal girl next door thats all over you, i will pick the girl next door.

1) if you are looking for a value punt - Dont bother with SA.. I've tried it all at this point. I done everything from walk-ups, the hotel walk-ins, did escorts, been to the 1% room salons in korea. Tried south east asia, been to Thailand, tried everything from pickup bars to places like club alexis in jakarta to ktvs and had a blast! But all this still doesnt compare to my experiences on SA.

2) SA is not designed for single males, who can go out and have casual dates and are looking for a quick shag. Most of the time, its for people that have baggage and want to have a discreet relationship. Its also designed for SD, you are essentially trying to find a mistress who will be with you exclusive for a time.  

a few tips on SA, anyone that has long standing profile is normally going to be a ppm type of person. I avoid ppm because they are just like the other options out there, a quick punt - and these punts don't offer me anything anymore. The ones that really are a blast to meet are the girls who are connecting with you, understand the game so emotionally there is still a line, but its pushed way back compared to other working girls.

These are the type of girls that you want. They want to be your mistress and be exclusive with you.  These girls know you got baggage, they also are doing it for the money. But they understand they bring something else to the table, they are willing to connect with you, they are open to the emotional connection and willing to have intimacy at a level your not going to get with a working girl

Typically these girls activate their profile between SD and deactivate them when they are with a SD. I see 3 groups of girls on SA. 1) ppm - these girls go from one meet to the next and offer sex - no different that whats out there 2) monthly with boundaries, high maintenance girls that are doing the same thing but the prices are just higher 3) true sugar babbies imo - exclusive, trying to connect with someone and once you hit that connection they treat you like a bf - honestly there are no limits to the sex.

5) once youve filtered to that type of category of girls, it is all about taking your time and dating them. Its about breaking down those walls and building that trust. Because once you get them to that point - the sex is AMAZING! Honestly there are no limits youve built that trust up between two parties - ive been offered more bbfs on SA than ive ever received over all my years of punting. The intimacy is more genuine and its just amazing imo.

If you are single, can date openly - Looking for a quick shag and find SA expensive - i agree there are other options that meet your need better.

SA is really designed for ppl that are prob married, individuals that are further along in their careers where the costs arent a factor, but want a young hot mistress on the side. Quick punts dont do it for us anymore because weve punted so much and need more genuine connections.

Hope this helps,

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shyrocket   31-1-2021 23:27  Acceptance  +3   Great advice
dirk69   1-10-2020 08:31  Acceptance  +3   Excellent
chebschebschebs   28-9-2020 09:26  Acceptance  +2   My feelings exactly
OscarPistorius   26-9-2020 21:53  Acceptance  +5   You nailed it, good summary
jeffzeke   26-9-2020 11:33  Acceptance  +20   excellent summary and I agree wholeheartedly.
alex_french   26-9-2020 07:21  Acceptance  +5   Thanks for your insight
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jeffzeke
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Hey guys, I found this excellent tip from a reddit user and I'm copying his text here.  He offered this as advice for anyone interested in getting into "sugar" SD/SB arrangements.  They are fantastic, so I am posting here for you.  Again, not written by me, but I share the same experiences, and agree with almost all points:


  1. I look for a Sugar Relationship that feels like normal dating, but with boundaries and financial support.

  2. There should be mutual attraction, mutual chemistry and mutual respect

  3. There should be mutual Attention, mutual Appreciation and mutual Affection

  4. We should build a friendship and not make each other feel like it is only business, but we should both understand the financial expectations.

  5. Because of the typical age gap, there should not be any expectation of a serious relationship that leads to marriage or children.

  6. Because it is Sugar Dating, when we are not together we stay in contact, but respect each others privacy and private life.

  7. When we are together, we do very normal dating activities like dining out, cooking in, movies out, movies in, clubs, beaches, hikes, trips, etc and sex should feel like a natural part of the relationship.

  8. Neither of us should feel like we are being taken advantage of or taking advantage of the other.

  9. I always start with an uncompensated platonic M&G in a safe, comfortable public place like a coffee shop, restaurant or bar.

  10. If she is relatively new to Sugar Dating I will let her know I understand it can be scary and unnerving for a young woman to meet an older man she only recently met on the internet for a "date". I will offer to speak on the phone or video call in advance to help put them at ease. I will ask if they get "cold feet" to let me know in advance and I would be happy to reschedule to a time when they are more comfortable. Putting them at ease dramatically reduces ghosting.

  11. I will mention financial support many times during the discussion and gauge their comfort level with discussing money. If they change the subject or seem uncomfortable, I won't push it. I prefer not to discuss allowance specifics until after we have confirmed mutual interest either at the M&G or just after, but I am fine discussing it earlier if they want to.

  12. I pay for all date related expenses at the M&G and often provide a gift at the end as a token of my interest. I will not agree to specific compensation for the M&G as part of agreeing to meet. Any request for a "meet fee" or "booking fee" is an automatic next.

  13. Even though we both agreed on an uncompensated platonic M&G, my best Sugar Relationships have started with very strong natural attraction and chemistry that led both of us to throw away the rule book and had sex as a continuation of the M&G with out even discussing allowance. I always provided an allowance at the end, but felt stopping to discuss finances would have interrupted the mood.

  14. We start the arrangement with an agreement on a per date allowance (others call it a Pay Per Meet (PPM)) and on how often we would like to meet, assuming things go well. I typically agree to weekly dates.

  15. Neither of us is obligated to continue if we aren't getting what we want out of the relationship.

  16. I will tell them that I believe most people know if they are sexually attracted to someone quickly, but I understand it may take some time to feel comfortable acting on that attraction. I don't assume we will have sex on our first "real" date, but I make it clear that if it takes too long for her to be comfortable with sex, I will assume she is either not attracted to me or does not have a very strong sex drive and we would not be a good match.

  17. I will express my interest in a long term exclusive Sugar Relationship, but assume we are not exclusive at the start, both will keep are options open and practice safe sex.

  18. After dating a while, I may agree to transition to a weekly allowance. I move to an allowance as a recognition of how the relationship has developed, not as an incentive to move the relationship to a higher level. If something is missing in the relationship, moving to an allowance will just make that something worse.

  19. Moving to allowance takes trust on both sides and trust takes time and consistent actions to build. By this time, we should have discussed and agreed to exclusivity, regularly have overnights and have agreed to sex without protection.

  20. I pay the allowance independent of how often we meet. Some weeks we may not meet at all, others we may meet 2+ times, but I expect we will meet more frequently.

  21. I would normally increase the weekly allowance to more than the per date allowance. She gets more allowance, I get a reduced per date rate. If we genuinely like seeking each other it is a win-win.

  22. I enjoy providing gifts, travel and experiences, but don't include it as an expectation of the arrangement because it is too undefined and sets us both up for disappointment. I will think I'm being generous and she is disappointed. Any request for extra support early in the relationship is a major turn off. As the relationship matures, additional asks are allowed and expected.

  23. I enjoy being dominant sexually and would need to explore that as part of the Sugar Relationship, but I introduce the concept carefully and slowly increase the experience after reviewing each experience and discussing what we would like to try next time allowing for full disclosure and consent at each step along the way.

  24. I've had 3 Long Term Sugar Relationships that each lasted over a year. One lasted more than 4.5 years, but transitioned from SB/SD to boyfriend/girlfriend, and from boyfriend/girlfriend to living together. We almost married.

  25. I remain good friends with all 3 of the women from my longest Sugar Relationships and expect we will be life long friends.


[ Last edited by  jeffzeke at 1-2-2021 15:21 ]

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ramont   1-2-2021 00:10  Acceptance  +8   After reading, this my thoughts are "why the fuck aren't you just trying to find someone, as in a real relationship?"
shyrocket   31-1-2021 23:28  Acceptance  +3   Even more great advice! Thanks and excellent
russellrobinson   31-1-2021 19:22  Acceptance  +3   
talisker88   31-1-2021 19:01  Acceptance  +2   
alex_french   31-1-2021 15:39  Acceptance  +5   Good info
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flappo84
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Post at 31-1-2021 14:45  Profile P.M. 
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Good luck with this one in HK: “ I will not agree to specific compensation for the M&G as part of agreeing to meet. Any request for a "meet fee" or "booking fee" is an automatic next.“

Standard request is like 1k/meet these days. Some crazy ones ask for 5k for a lunch only. Seems some people agree to that so there’s a market for this behaviour. Big dislike.

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jdman   4-2-2021 04:00  Acceptance  +2   Actually, in my area of the USA, it's not the uncommon for the ladies on SA to ask for the meeting fee.
test74   31-1-2021 21:00  Acceptance  +4   
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